I’ve got so many tabs open in my brain as I begin writing this blog post. Tabs about our Halloween costume options (crap, it’s less than a week away!). Tabs about upcoming plans and shopping for Christmas presents. Tabs about how to express what I want to say to a person I love and miss so much who has distanced themselves from me.

For this week’s blog post, however, I’d like to focus on hearth and home. Domesticity. Cool air and the rust, amber, and scarlet leaves falling outside while we remain cozy indoors inspires this in me.

Being indoors, cooking and baking, heck, even going through my raggedy-ass recipe binder is my jam right now. It comforts me and keeps my mind occupied.

I remember, years ago, while our oldest (probably 8 or 9 at the time) was enjoying whatever supper I had just put on the table, she said “Mom, you’re such a good cooker!” It warmed my heart and gave me the giggles. It remains a family joke, tossed around liberally when any of us makes something another deems delicious.

I do have a recipe to share with you here today, fellow foodies. I’ll put it at the end of this post.

First, though, I’m going to be real with you here. I’m overweight and conflicted about it. I go back and forth in my brain on a daily basis about it, frankly. On one hand, I’m not that overweight. 13 pounds, to be precise. Just 13 pounds. I keep a food diary to keep myself honest but it’d be dishonest of me to say that practice is the secret to any weight loss. At this point it’s more like a compulsion.

There’s plenty that I like about my body, my shape. I have the ability to dress myself in ways that camoflauge my mid-section, where my extra pounds tend to gather. I’m able to easily walk a couple of miles without needing to take any breaks. My extra weight does not hinder me from doing anything really.

On the other hand, I’ll catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror sometimes and cringe. Or a picture of myself. I’m sure at least some of you can relate.

But this is the time of the year when I start to dream of all the goodies I can bake. The hotdishes that bring to mind growing up in Minnesota and adulting in Wisconsin. Showing my love for others via tasty comfort food.

Suffice it to say that my commitment to losing weight by eating healthier is waning as the temps decrease here in Minnesconsin.

Ok, folks, it’s time for the promised recipe. It’s a classic recipe for bars I’ve made numerous times over the years and it does have oatmeal in it, so it’s not entirely unhealthy. I just made a batch the other day and brought 75% of it to work (lest I gobble it all up myself in the kitchen late at night).

M ‘n M (or is it M and M?) bars:

Mix up the following and put 1/2 of it in a 9 by 11 inch baking pan:

2 Cups Quick Oats

1/2 Cup Flour

1 Cup Butter, slightly melted

1 tspn. Baking Soda

3/4 tspn. Salt

1 Cup Brown Sugar

Bake that at 375 degrees for 12 minutes.

While that’s baking, mix up the following:

1 can Sweetened Condensed Milk

1/3 Cup Peanut Butter

Pull the baking pan out of the oven after 12 minutes and pour that sticky goodness over the top.

Then take the other 1/2 of the oatmeal crumble mixture that’s left and mix in a cup of M&M’s (I use the Halloween colored ones because I’m fancy). Sprinkle that on top and then put it back in the oven for 18 minutes.

Enjoy and Happy Halloween!