Monthly Archives: May 2023

Ambition, Anxiety, Blogging, Curiosity, Fear, Irony, Overthinking, Self-Reflection, SocialAnxiety

This Time I Have a Question For You

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Why do you blog?

Let me explain where this question comes from.

My blogging anxiety these days is hitting an all-time high. I started a series, here, the 4th installment of what you are reading now, entitled “I Have Questions”. I’m terrible at promoting myself but I know it’s part of the deal if I want to grow my following and make something more of this blogging thing. In that spirit, here’s the first, second, and third post in my series.

I fear I may have inadvertently set myself up for failure by starting this series. It came from a good and curious place, but I didn’t think it through. Questions? We all have questions, right? What those questions are can’t be forced, which is what I’ve been struggling with. Which I think is ridiculous.

I published a post in March of 2021, when I was working still. It was about why I blog. And I missed some things in that post. I didn’t go deep enough.

It’s still true that I blog for the connections I make and the things I learn along the way in the blogosphere. And yes, I still blog because the feedback I often get is validating and gives me warm fuzzies.

I now have more followers than I did then so it seemed right to me to ponder the question again, with the hope that you will all join in. Posing this question now also gives me an opportunity to tell you all, from my heart, why I have kept this up.

The primary reason I blog, or more specifically, write, is because it’s much more comfortable for me to find the words and write them out than it is for me to find the words and use my voice to speak them out loud. Especially when I have a lot to say, which you all know I do.

When I was younger and had an argument with someone, often I’d be so upset that all I could do was cry. I couldn’t form the words or turn off the tears easily. So I would grab a notebook and write it all out. Sometimes I’d craft it into a letter that I’d give to the person who had upset me so. Often the act of writing it down had to be enough because I believed sharing it with them would not be welcome or understood.

While I love being around people and having meaningful conversations, it gives me a lot of anxiety. I feel embarrassed if others eyes are on me, which results in me tripping over or mispronouncing words, or I freeze mid-sentence and lose whatever train of thought I was riding on. Writing is easier. No one is looking at me while I do it, waiting for me to get to the damn point already.

I recognize the irony here, however. The irony of being so self-conscious when conversing with others that I don’t show up as well as I want to; yet here I am, telling so much of my business on the internet where literally anyone can see it. And judge me.

Maybe I’m crazy. Probably. Because I’m sticking with the blogging thing, including my “I Have Questions” series.

It still feels right to me.

So, again, I ask: why do you blog?

Baking, Community, Curiosity, Facebook, gardening, Google, Lifestyle

The Latest Question

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Is rhubarb a fruit or a vegetable?

This is what my brain started to wonder about a couple of weeks ago.

The visual from my yard that prompted this initial question:

This is one bush? Or is it simply called a plant?

I’m proud to say that while I was tempted to say it’s a fruit (based on my association of rhubarb to sweet baked goods), just before I clicked enter when I put that question into Google search, I thought “no, it’s a vegetable”. I think it’s because it grows in the ground.

It’s not uncommon for a question answered to lead to another question, which is what happened next.

Because of course, I have no idea what to do with it. I fancy myself a maven of the kitchen, but rhubarb is not something that has ever been in my repertoire. My vague recollection of rhubarb, as I don’t think Bonnie (my mom) grew it in her backyard garden, is that it’s not pleasant to eat raw. That must have been someone else’s garden. It tasted like sour celery. I do have memories, however, of enjoying it baked in cake or muffins.

So, I proceeded on a quest for “best practices” for all things rhubarb. My walking buddy/neighbor, who is far more knowledgeable than I of all things gardening, told me last week that I ought to be picking it within the next couple of weeks.

Time was of the essence, and because I think it’s more fun to crowd- source certain questions than it is to Google it out, I turned to Facebook.

I learned that cutting the stalks is a no-no. Doing so prevents it from growing back next year. I was told by many to not eat the leaves as they are poisonous (not like it would occur to me to eat them in the first place). Freezing the cut-up stalks was a common piece of advice, which I will be following. My Facebook friends were enthusiastic about strawberry rhubarb jam and pies too.

One response was via DM from a friend from our old neighborhood in La Crosse. She had just pulled her rhubarb stalks out of her garden and was in the process of cooking them down with water and sugar to make sauce when she happened upon my query on Facebook. She told me she freezes the sauce to pour over ice cream, yogurt, or cake in the winter months. She also shared that she makes a “mean” rhubarb gin and tequila. I’m not a gin fan, but that sure sounds like a creative use for this vegetable doesn’t it?

I also perused Bonnie’s recipe box and found a few different recipes for cake, muffins, and pie. I love seeing her handwriting on these cards. It conjures up her voice for me, which is bittersweet. Kind of like rhubarb, I suppose.

The surprise bonus for me was the anecdotal information Bonnie provided on some of the recipe cards. The “Mom” in the recipe referred to as “Mom’s Wonderful Rhubarb Cake” was Bonnie’s mom, my Grandma Pearl. I gathered this from Bonnie writing “just super good and mom doesn’t esp. like rhubarb”. Another recipe card I found among the rhubarb recipes in Bonnie’s recipe box was for orange bread. She noted at the top of the card “Dad’s”. That would be her dad, my Grandpa Fritz.

I’m thinking rhubarb sauce would be quite delicious drizzled on top of this orange bread. I’ll report back once I’ve tried making it.

Blogging, Creative Writing, Curiosity, Education, Self Improvement

A Question about Questions

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What do you think: Is there such a thing as a “stupid” question?

Any answer you might give to this question is going to be subjective.

Here’s mine: Yes, but…

Such as “but it’s a matter of opinion” or “but it’s better to ask a stupid question than to pretend you know the answer”.

I mean, technically and subjectively, stupid questions do exist. Because stupid people exist.

I’m going to resist the temptation I have to be sarcastic and come up with examples of stupid questions here.

Question-askers ought to be encouraged. Nobody should feel they can’t ask questions in any given situation. Questions lead to answers, and answers fill up our tanks of knowledge. Isn’t that what we all want in this life, to gain knowledge?

What one thinks is a stupid question, another is seeking the answer. It may not just be the question-asker; it could be one or more people within earshot of the question. It is both unhelpful and unkind to share our opinion with the asker that the question is stupid. It doesn’t move things forward and it doesn’t engender trust in the person being asked the question.

It shuts curiosity down.

I will stick with the technically incorrect yet kinder, gentler school of thought that “there’s no such thing as a stupid question” as I believe my opinion on the intelligence of a question anyone asks of me is much less important than respecting others and fostering meaningful, loving, and trusting relationships.

Simple as that.

Now, the questions I ask in this series (which began with this post) may be considered silly or odd, but I aim to avoid judging any of them as “stupid”. As I hope you, my smart readers, will avoid as well. Go ahead and school me if you will, but please be nice about it.

I’m a student, folks, and my purpose in that role is to ask questions so that I can learn. If through my posing, pondering, and answering them, I can manage to enlighten any of you out there along the way, all the better.

***Featured image courtesy of https://www.pngitem.com/so/question-marks/

Blogging, Creative Writing, Curiosity, Education, Google, Humor, Words

I Have Questions

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This post is about declaring that I am a student.

Not a “student of life”. That’s trite.

Now, I am a student of a lot of things. So many that I need to start narrowing it down, or I’m about to learn a little about a lot of things.

And that will make my brain hurt. No point in opening myself up to that.

As a student, the most important thing is to maintain your curiosity. That’s why I’m starting what might be a series on this blog here with just one question.

And today, I’m an English major. Or a student of high school English. You decide.

Gotta start somewhere, right?

Now, onto my question.

I’ve been hemming and hawing about “honing in vs. homing in” for the past several days. Sorry, I couldn’t resist. It was that or “Hemming and Hawing about Honing In vs. Homing In” as the title of this blog post.

Is it “honing in” or “homing in”? I’ve seen it both ways in different publications and I can’t tell which is right. I’ve always thought it was “honing in”.

Excuse me while I google that.

Aren’t we so spoiled that whenever we have a question we can just “google” it?

First thing I found when I searched Google:

From prowritingaid.com: “Home in and hone in are commonly confused phrases which both refer to narrowing in on a particular topic. Home in means to locate and move toward something. Hone in means to focus on something.“

Not necessarily helpful.

From masterclass.com: “Home in is more acceptable and means to direct on a target. The phrasal verb derives from the 19th-century use of homing pigeons, but it resurged in the 20th century to refer to missiles that home in on their targets. It’s also commonly used metaphorically, where to home in on something is to focus on and make progress toward it.”

An image of a Homing Pigeon for reference

From grammarist.com: “The definition of hone is to sharpen an object or a skill. You can hone a blade, but you can also hone your negotiation skills or cooking skills.”.

And, this: “So, the main difference between “hone in” and “home in” lies in the definition of their first words. Some sentences can use both phrases, but the meaning won’t be the same.”

Hmm…something to ponder for a bit I suppose.

So neither one is right or wrong; they are two separate phrases. I still am unsure that I have a clear understanding of what the differences are.

And I think when it comes to my writing/blogging pursuits, both phrases could be used.

I may not get this right (feel free to correct me if I’m wrong-remember I’m a student!) but, in relation to this blog post, a true statement using these two phrases, would be this:

I homed in on what question I wanted to start this series with and in the process of writing this blog post, I have honed in on the difference between “home in and hone in”.

I think anyway.

Fellow English students, what’s your take on these two similar, yet apparently different phrases?