In a work setting, have you ever had to participate in an exercise, individually, then gather as a group later to discuss the experience?
I have. It made me super uncomfortable. Which I suppose is the point of these kinds of things.
It happened when I was working for a non-profit that served senior citizens, which is the population the agency I now work for serves.
The exercise was about uncovering our unconscious bias. Individually, we were directed to view images of different sorts of people. Hispanic, Black, Young, Male, Old, Asian, White, Female, etc. You get the gist. We were to, without thinking, select which of two images before us that we preferred (to work with). To just go with our instincts, suspending self-judgement.
A tall order.
The most disturbing result, for me, was that my preference skewed towards young people. I was working at a place that served old people, folks. It made me question everything. Am I an ageist? Am I not supposed to be serving senior citizens because of my unconscious bias? Should I switch paths and become a teacher, like my Dad always thought I should?
I was beside myself for a bit.
But, that was then and this is now. In the ensuing years, my perspective on aging and relating with older people has evolved. I’ve certainly moved past feeling terrible about this revelation.
It’s true that I love interacting with young people. I’ve got a grandson who just turned 10 and I embrace being his grandma. I find him, as well as plenty of other people younger than me, inspiring. Being in the company of youngins invigorates me. It often gives me hope for our collective future as a species.
It’s also true that there are plenty of people older, in some cases, quite a bit older than I, who I greatly enjoy being around. Those elders I find interesting, wise, and inspiring. Not only do I have the great fortune of having a pair of second parents (Mr. NOA’s mom and dad) in my life, but I also get opportunities to interact with other senior citizens in my work life (clients and volunteers) regularly.
These people model for me generosity of spirit. Generosity of wisdom. Generosity of their time and their money. I wholeheartedly respect and appreciate them for that.
And, it’s not lost on me that I am a Gen X’r (who is actively pondering what that even means to me personally) who is a senior citizen herself. I mean, most senior discounts are given once you turn 55…and I’m 2 years beyond that now.
I guess my point is this (and yes, this makes me sound like the seasoned crone I am): age, smage. I’m more interested in other characteristics of those I work and spend time with, such as their senses of humor, their talents and skills, and their outlooks on life.
As a nation and a world, we are living in interesting times. We all have our unconscious biases, whether we participate in exercises that reveal them or not. Ageism is but one “ism” that we ought to be honestly and openly discussing, don’t you think?
Pollyanna's Path 
Wow — what a fascinating (and potentially disturbing) exercise. Of course we all have unconscious biases, and it sounds worthwhile to get those out in the open (at least for yourself) and acknowledge them and how they might be impacting your work life.
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Exactly! Thanks for your comments 🙂
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Ageism has gotten a lot of discussion in recent years in the literary/publishing world, where, of course, everyone’s supposed to be young and sexy. Unfortunately writing a book takes years and we’re all getting un-younger and un-sexier every day, ha! In my work-work, I think about this often, as I spend a lot of time on a college campus, talking with young people just getting started in life and career. And I wonder, when I seek a full-time position, will I be passed over for someone younger, someone savvier with social media and everything Millennial or whatever that next generation is called!? Sure, our culture is youth-obsessed, but experience has to count for something, I hope!
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Young and sexy, right? I prefer “seasoned and saucy” myself! Experience certainly must count. Take our president for example. Yes, he’s old but man, he’s crushing it because of his experiences. And he’s got a good crew backing him up. Thanks for your thoughtful comments.
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I don’t like that exercise, Rhonda. Yes, we all have biases. I’m all for reflection and personal growth, but what a strange approach! I understand your discomfort.
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Yeah, I didn’t like it much myself either! Some of my co-workers were pretty outraged over it, as I recall.
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Rhonda,
I’m one of these weird people who looks at the individual, which would make me a horrible sociologist because while I acknowledge “demographics,” that isn’t my major concern in life. I can only know an individual — not a group. The thing is, some people I like. Others not so much. It has to do with their personality. So, whoever you are, I’m going to like you until you prove to me that I shouldn’t. And if I get to the point that I don’t anymore (that takes a tremendous effort for me to not like someone), then I’ve moved on. Don’t wish anyone ill, but I’m gonna have to stay away from that person because they are not good for me to be around. BUT the very cool thing is that we all evolve over time — hopefully, for the better (but not always.) So, I may not like someone now and find that years later, I like them much more. And vice versa. We’re all people who have strengths, challenges and people problems just like everyone else. I’ve yet to meet a person (young or old or however else you want to describe) that isn’t a complex human being. We all have good traits and stinky traits and mediocre traits. The best I can do is go on the info in front of me. I’m going to do my best, but, no doubt, I’m going to make a ton of mistakes. I hope I can be forgiven for them. I hope I can forgive as well. Most of life is trial and error and waiting. As of yet, I haven’t met anyone who is divine, just wholly human and all that that implies. We may strive toward perfection (and EVERYONE has a different idea of what that is and what that looks like), but no one will attain it because no one is perfect. Expectations are notorious for creating misery, but maybe they’re also necessary evils sometimes. I dunno. Either way, that’s my two cents as pertains to your engaging discussion, my friend! I’m sure I’ve left something out, so I hope you can forgive me for that too. 🙃 Mona
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Hey, I appreciate your two cents (as always), friend! It is so true that there are people you like then later change your mind, and those that you at first don’t like then wind up adoring later. Life is funny that way!
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