Friendships, Humor, Life, marriage, Self-Reflection, Time Management

Chronically Tardy

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Who’s chronically late out there?

I’m pokey. I take forever to get things done. To get my ass in gear.

I know I am not the only one.

My chronic tardiness annoys the hell out of people, especially the Hubs, who is very punctual.

Bless his heart, he’s put up with this for over 33 years.

Virtually anyone who knows me IRL will say that having a relationship with me, the kind where you go places in public together, requires patience.

I’ve become more self-aware in the last year, however, which is why I aim to be purposefully patient when I’m interacting with others. Whether it’s my immediate family, the neighbor I just met in my driveway, or my favorite female friends, I try to pay it back.

Yet, my frequent tardiness causes unnecessary stress. I don’t like feeling like I’m disappointing people. But know this: I’m continually running late not because I don’t value your presence and don’t have a feeling of adrenaline running through me in anticipation of whatever we’re doing together.

I like to think those who know me best sense this vibe coming out of me every which way in these moments and choose to love me anyway.

I believe my chronic tardiness is how I’m wired.

Bear with me here.

I was born late. About 6 or 7 years late, I’d say, based on what my Mom told me often when she was still alive.

I was the baby my parents hoped and tried for, after my sister was born. I just took my sweet time getting here. I was born just a bit over 8 years after her.

It stands to reason that my late arrival into this world has at least something to do with my chronic lateness. It’s a theory anyway. Not an excuse, mind you, but an explanation.

I kid you not: I recently perused my old high school yearbook. On one page, there was what can only be referred to as a rambling mess of inside jokes written by, I imagine, a small group of nerdy yearbook kids. At the end of this “piece” is written “and Rhonda K is still eating lunch”.

That, of course, was me they were referring to.

I read an article on NPR earlier this year about chronic lateness. I found it really interesting, and you may as well. Click here for the link.

According to the article, time is a social construct. How cultures view time varies, though essentially one’s view is either “event” based or “clock” based. I clearly fall more into the “event based” camp. If I tell you I’m going to meet up with you today at 11 a.m., I will meet up with you. I’m never one of those “no show” people. Yet, perhaps largely because I am an American living in the U.S., I understand and appreciate those in the “clock based” crowd.

Would you consider yourself “clock” based or “event” based when it comes to time? And what do you make of it?

While you consider those questions, I hope you take the time to enjoy this “timely” cover of a fantastic pop song by Chicago, “Does Anybody Really Know What Time it Is?”

***Header image courtesy of https://quotesgram.com/late-funny-quotes/

Blogging, Creative Writing, Granparenting, Life, Parenting, Photography, Unemployment

8 Things I Noticed in April of 2022

9 Comments

It’s now 2/28/23 and I’m realizing this is a post I could publish now. It captured a specific moment in time for me. I wrote it and never published it. I was newly unemployed and planning our move back home.

In other words, I’ve been taking some time today to review all my draft folders. I’m cleaning this digital joint up.

Originally written by me on 4/22/22 and seeing the light just today, these were the 8 things I noticed then:

  • I noticed that my grandson has a beautiful singing voice. Song choice was a sweet surprise: “Close to You” by the Carpenters.
  • Spending time on Twitter can be quite fun. Different but in a good way, from Facebook. Too bad it’s getting overtaken by an oligarch.
  • That my daughter parents differently (and in a lot of important ways, better) than me when she and her sibling were young.
  • My house is in disarray.
  • That we have (had) far too many photos. Sure, there were plenty of precious ones I had to keep (to eventually scan so everything that isn’t in a frame is digitized). But these were photos taken back in the day when you had to put actual film in a camera. And you had no way to see them until you had them developed. In a lab. And half the time there were months between shots so when you dropped off your film, you thought there’d be a chance that there’d be some good ones in there. So you’d want to keep one for yourself and share with someone else, so you checked the box to have 2 copies of each picture. Then you’d get them back like 10 days later only to find out a mere 6 out of the 24 pictures on the film were sort of decent but the rest would be blurry shots of the sky with a smidge of your brother’s eyebrow in the corner.
  • I naturally want to go to sleep for the night later and get up later now that I’m not working.
  • I only have three good bras. That is it. And they are all the same style and size. Just different colors.
  • Almost every show that I absolutely loved but had long ass breaks since the last season due to Covid-19, are all coming back with new seasons right now. Simultaneously. When, ironically, I’m unable to binge any of them at the moment. I’ve got too many other things to do with the big move to Wisconsin coming in less than 3 weeks.

Thank you friends, for reading my share here today. We’ll see if I find any more.

Now, back to editing……

But just one last thing.

An example of a pic taken in the 80’s that we had to pay for someone to develop and wait for days to get from the pharmacy.

Yep, that’s me. Circa 1985 in my MN state university dorm room.
Ambition, Arts and Crafts, Changes, Clarity, Education, Employment, Grandparenting, Lifestyle, Self-Reflection, Work, Writing

Liberal Arts Grandma ISO Meaningful Work

9 Comments

The level of clarity I have about life, mine of course, but also general life, if you know what I mean, has increased significantly in the last year.

This is on account of all the changes. The cross country move, the new lifestyle and routine, our daughter and grandson overcoming so much and blossoming in their new environment.

I’m feeling settled in here now. At a point of reflection, just gobsmacked over the changes that had to occur and the choices that had to be made to get me and (most of) my beloved crew here, living 15 minutes from each other in this 4 season wonderland that is Minnesconsin.

Not that life is perfect; I’m just marinating in this feeling of being “settled”.

However, I know I can’t marinate indefinitely. Nor do I want to.

Paid employment is beckoning me at the moment. I’m itching to get back at it. But I’m still in charge of the now 9 year old at least a few afternoons per week, and I’m seeing that this might continue through the school year.

So, paid employment for me is kind of on the back burner for now.

That’s ok however, because I have yet to figure out what it is exactly I want to or can do and be paid for it. This the one big thing I don’t yet have clarity on.

Example: I opted for a free upgrade recently on LinkedIn. I thought it would be helpful for me to engage more on that site. However, when I went to update my profile, I was prompted to describe the kind of job I am looking for.

I blanked. I literally didn’t realize until that moment that I don’t know exactly what kind of job I want. So, I stopped right there and shortly after canceled my upgrade to prevent myself from being charged a monthly fee.

I might go back to it, upgrade it again. Once I figure out what kind of job I’m looking for, that is.

In my fantasy life, the job of my dreams (you know, the one that allows me to work part time writing and supporting others in various ways to move forward and achieve their hearts desire) just shows up. It appears out of thin air and I gratefully latch onto it and thank my lucky stars.

But that is not how it works. Ever.

Not that I’m not a believer in manifestation, but I know I’ve got to put some work into it. Take some action.

While I ponder paid employment, I’m hell bent on being more active. Physically, mentally, and intellectually. What’s cool about this for me is that I’ve got a sidekick. My grandson needs to be engaged in learning so he can move forward and so do I.

That means my “job” right now is to learn and grow with him. I refuse to put on a teacher hat when he’s here because it’s important to me that my role as his Grandma remains intact for him.

That compels me to think outside the box. To figure out how to engage him without saying words like “learn” or “teach” in his presence. He balks when those words are uttered. So I have to be a little sneaky about it, kind of like those parents who whirl veggies in a blender and put it in the muffins they’re baking for the kids.

I like the notion of being the “liberal arts” Grandma. She who engages her grandchild’s artistic and creative tendencies in a way that sheds new light into his brain and heart.

Image courtesy of https://www.pinterest.com/pin/17170042308639399/

One thing I did recently with him is to ask him to teach me how to do oragami, something I know he’s good at and likes to do. As a kid with ADHD, he needs to keep his hands busy pretty much all the time. He was very receptive to it and seemed to appreciate my suggestion that one of the pieces of oragami I created could be turned into a piece of art, like a picture frame.

So, my new theory is that both he and I can learn together via arts and crafts projects. That can be my contribution to his education.

Pinterest, here I come!

Celebrate, Entertainment, Fun, Humor, Love, Romance, Television

Love, American Style

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Are you singing that song in your head, folks?

You, fellow Gen X and up Americans, most likely know what song I’m referring to. It’s the one from that goofy t.v. show of the same title from the 1970’s. I think it might be the first tune that my brain latched onto as a youth.

For those not in the know, here it is:

Clearly, this is a post about love. It’s Valentine’s Day and yesterday was Galentine’s Day, my lovely readers!

I just had to give a shout out to a character I loved so much from one of the best American sitcoms ever: that waffle loving gal Leslie Knope from Parks and Recreation, played by the wonderful Amy Poehler.

Image courtesy of https://merakimusings.org/galentines-day/

Speaking of Parks and Recreation, Hubs and I recently began watching “The Last of Us” on HBO Max. And, to our surprise, Ron Swanson showed up.

Of course, the actor, Nick Offerman was not in character as Ron Swanson here. That would be weird. He was instead playing a character living in isolation after the world went to complete crap due to a fungal catastrophe that killed the majority of humans and turned them into zombies.

His character, Bill, encountered another man, Frank, who was seeking shelter. Bill opened up his home to Frank and they fell in love.

I applaud the writers and creators of this show for giving us a tender and honest story that reflects the vulnerability of falling in love. As a LGBTQ+ ally, I appreciate that they chose to validate and lift up same-sex love and romance in the way they did. This episode brought me to tears and I believe Nick Offerman deserves all of the awards that exist for sharing this character and his story with the world.

As Bill, Nick Offerman performed a song (originally sung by the songbird Linda Ronstadt), in such a beautifully vulnerable manner in this episode. It really touched my heart, and I can’t imagine it not touching yours. Here it is, courtesy of YouTube:

This gives me chills

Any of you who haven’t yet seen “The Last of Us” ought to really get on with it. It is just so well done.

Since I’m going on here about love-worthy American t.v. shows; I’ve gotta tell you I love the new show on Peacock, “Poker Face”. It stars the one and only Natasha Lyonne (who, incidentally, worked with Amy Poehler from the aforementioned Parks and Recreation to create Russian Doll on Netflix), and it’s a winner. One of the many cool things about this show, beyond Natasha’s portrayal of the character Charlie, is how the producers put in little bits of nostalgia for those old mystery shows that some of us watched back in the 70’s. Like good old “Kojak” and “Murder She Wrote”.

For instance, the font used in the credits. The titles of episodes (like “Exit Stage Death” which featured Ellen Barkin and Tim Meadows at their ridiculous best). The way how, at the end of each episode, Charlie presents her thought process on what really happened (i.e., who, how, and why the person was murdered). It’s so refreshing to see a t.v. show that is about murder yet not overtly violent. In one episode, Charlie made a reference to “Felix Unger” from the “Odd Couple”, which I thought was particularly clever.

I believe that American t.v. is very good at the moment and I am loving it.

How about you?

I hope your Valentine’s Day is full of sweet, funny, and lovely moments, whether you watch some good old (or new) American t.v. or not. And plenty of chocolate of course!

Image courtesy of https://tokyotreat.com/blog/valentines-day-candy-the-best-straight-from-tokyo

Anxiety, Blogging, Emotions, Hope, Life, Mental Health, Moods, Self-Reflection, Time

On Being a WIP and Meloncholy

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You know, sometimes I feel like I could lose my mind. There’s just so much going on in this head of mine. I can sense the tears but they rarely come out.

Whew.

I don’t think I’m depressed per se. I’m just mixed up. Feeling like I’m wandering and unable to sort out where I’m going. Very much like I’m caught up in the space I’m in, yet certain that there’s something new on the horizon waiting for me to jump into it.

I think there’s something to a new concept I read about this morning online: purpose anxiety. Or maybe it’s a diagnosis. I think I have it. I think this “gap year” I’m in is similar to the other one that I had in that I get to a point where I’ve got too much time on my hands. Yet I feel like I’m not accomplishing anything of value. Like I ought to be using my time more wisely.

Meloncholy resonates with me today. I googled the word to gain a better understanding of it’s meaning and came upon this definition by Emily Brady at the University of Michigan (link here)”meloncholy is something we desire from time to time, for it provides an opportunity for indulgent self-reflection. We enjoy this time out for reflection, but the pleasure is also connected to recollecting that which we long for, which this reflective element can be even exhilirating or uplifting.”

It’s also full on winter here in Minnesconsin, which is something I haven’t experienced in the last 7 years. There’s snow everywhere you look and it’s so cold out there. It pushes me to hibernate.

Some of the parts about hibernating I actually like. Such as watching t.v. on my couch, especially if Radar chooses to be my cuddle buddy. Reading; though most of the reading I do these days is other people’s blog posts or NPR. I’ve been re-reading “Atlas of the Heart”, by Brene Brown, which I need to get back to as it’s been a few days. It’s such an important book to me. One I treasure. One of the few books I’ve read that has actually altered my perspective and, I think, improved the way I relate to others. It’s a keeper.

Yes, I recently published a blog post in which I listed all of the things I do just for fun. That feels a little ironic to me as I pour myself out here and now. Yet I stand by that post. I am of the mind that having fun, along with having something to look forward to, is very underrated in American culture.

That said, and I say this with the intention of pushing myself forward, I’m going to take the time to lay out some things I can do, actions I can take to just get on with it. To push through this little slump I’m in. I know it’s temporary.

I’m a WIP (Work in Progress), you’re a WIP, we’re all WIPs, right?

Progress, not perfection.

***Header image courtesy of https://lifeism.co/aesthetic-quotes-that-will-center-you-for-the-day

Friendships, Happiness, Home, Lifestyle, Positivity

Home is Minnesconsin

9 Comments

In several of my recent blog posts, I’ve talked about living in “Minnesconsin”. I just popped it in there on my blog posts since we moved back to Wisconsin from the Denver metro. No real explanation at all.

So this is a blog post to explain it. It’s important to me to share with you all the love I have for living where I do. Because “Minnesconsin” is my favorite place to live. My happy place.

I think people should know about this beautiful area of the U.S. and all that it has to offer.

Do you love where you are live like I do?

From the time we got engaged and moved in together (1989), until 2022, Hubs and I (and our kids many of these times), have moved 10 times. We have lived in 5 states in that span of time: Minnesota, Texas, Kansas, Wisconsin, and Colorado.

This fall, my BFF and her husband came for a visit. This was the first time they had seen our house. Their visit reinforced for me why it was such a good decision for us to settle in this area: our friends only had to drive a bit over 2 hours to get here. We haven’t lived this close to these dear friends of ours since I was pregnant with my second kid and we all lived in the Twin Cities metro. Many, many moons ago.

Minnesconsin is a very particular geographic location in Wisconsin (or Minnesota for that matter) that is a mere 35 to 60 minute drive to Minnesota (or Wisconsin). It’s like the best of both worlds to me.

If you’re interested, you can click here for the urban dictionary’s definition of Minnesconsin. It provides a bit more detail.

Both Minnesota and Wisconsin have my heart. You see, I was born and raised in Minnesota but spent many years of my adult life living in Wisconsin. Minnesconsin is where I was supposed to land all this time. Hubs feels the same way; that’s why we’re so happy here. It feels good and right.

Before we left Wisconsin for Colorado (2016), my friend Stacey (also from Minnesota originally), gave me a framed piece of art with the shape of the state of Wisconsin on it with the word “home” written on it. When I first saw it, I said “oh, cool, that’s the state of Colorado” (got a big old D in college geography, folks), then we all had a big laugh. At the time, I wasn’t thinking that we’d end up back in the state, at least not any time soon. I was hyper-focused on moving to and living in Colorado at the time.

Now we’re Minnesota Vikings fans in Cheesehead Country. We’re Wisconsin Supper Club fans from “way up in da northland”. We’re people from the “land of 10,000 lakes” who love the country/lake life in Sconny.

Our house is just a hair over an hour drive to the Minneapolis airport. Just over two hours to Duluth, near where I was born and raised. Yet, in Wisconsin near my in-laws, and now my daughter and grandson.

Minnesconsin is also a great place to visit, especially in the summer. There are small town festivals going on most weekends. Lots of lakes to boat and fish on and places to rent boats and other water toys. Beautiful trails to hike on and great little hole-in-the-wall bar/restaurants as well as the aforementioned supper clubs to dine in.

If you like snow and are not adverse to very cold temps, Minnesconsin is a fun spot to visit in the winter. About 20 minutes from our house, there’s a skiing and snow-tubing place. There are snow and ice-sculpting festivals happening on the weekends in the winter months around these parts. And, of course, opportunities for ice fishing on many of our lakes.

I’m looking forward to exploring more of Minnesconsin as time goes on as well as sharing tales on my exploits with you!

***Header image courtesy of https://untappd.com/b/hop-and-barrel-brewing-minnesconsin-lager/2402108 and Hop and Barrel Brewing

Blogging, Celebrate, Dancing, Fun, Happiness, Joy, Laughter, Playlists, Positivity, Spontaneity

8 Things I do for Fun

25 Comments

List five things you do for fun.

This was the daily prompt from WordPress and I’ve decided to go with it.

I am a fan of having fun. I think putting a pause on our adult responsibilities to be playful is good for our spirits.

Also at play here is that my birthday is coming up very soon and I’m excited to celebrate it with my family. My brain is in party mode!

I’m going to share not just 5, but 8 things that I do for fun. Because 8 is my lucky number, folks.

What do you like to do for fun?

Fun for me is:

  • Playing group board games like “Ransom Notes”, “Apples to Apples”, or “Scrabble” with family and/or friends. This is a guaranteed way to share laughs together. I love the feeling of relaxation in my whole body after some good old fashioned belly laughs.
  • Dance. Sometimes alone in my kitchen. Sometimes with my grandson when he challenges me to “dance-offs”. The more spontaneous the dancing is, the better. That’s where the joy is.
  • Creating music playlists. My method is to think of a mood I want to create or a genre I want to re-visit, then search online for songs under that category. While this is a more introverted way to have fun, often the end result is that I get to share these playlists with the special people in my life.
  • Thrift store shopping. It’s a surprising treasure hunt every time and freeing as well, as it’s guilt-free. I don’t come out of a thrift store with my purchases feeling bad about spending money, because I never spend that much. Even better, the money I spend often goes toward a cause that supports and lifts others up.
  • This. Blogging. Interacting with all of you in the comments.
  • Decorating my house. Using home decor I kept from our previous house in new ways. Finding just the right spot to put that cool piece of pottery I found at a thrift store. It’s a simple and creative activity that just tickles me.
  • Photography. Now, I don’t claim or even aim to be a professional photog necessarily. It’s just fun for me to capture shots in the day to day with my cell phone.
Karl the cat, when he came to visit last week
  • Spending time on the water. Trolling for fish in a boat while the sun warms my skin. Looking forward to doing this on our pontoon (the one we plan to buy in the next few months) this summer!

Changes, Grandparenting, Home, Joy, Lifestyle, Mantronyms

Simple Snapshots

2 Comments

With the new life I’m living now, I embrace the acronym K.I.S.S. It’s quite the versatile “mantronym” for me personally as I mentioned long ago, but these days it really is just “Keep It Simple Sister”.

So, this post is an example of that for me. A simple blog post where I share pictures I’ve taken since our big move to Minnesconsin last summer. Ones I haven’t shared in this space before.

2022 Christmas window display
Cardinal perched on a tree on my Mom’s Birthday 2022
“My Toy!” Radar Christmastime 2022
Little flower garden Summer 2022
Mr. Pig at the County Fair snoozing away Summer 2022
Grandson doing his favorite thing Summer 2022
Taxidermied Critters Display Small town Wisconsin Bar Summer 2022
Selfie taken at Hotel Boulderado March 2022
Art in a drawer at a Rocky Mountain cabin Feb of 2022
Ambition, Blogging, GenX, Imagination, Music, Positivity, Self Help, Self Improvement

What Fascinates You?

8 Comments

As a Gen X er, the 1980’s was the decade that saw me through the ages of 13 through 22. Music was a huge part of that experience for me. Much of that time, though, I was listening to songs and artists from the 1970’s. The music of the 1970’s sounded better to my ears, and still does.

But that doesn’t mean that I don’t have a few favorite songs that were put out in the 80’s.

One, in particular, has my attention again. On account of self-help maven Martha Beck.

It’s the song “Fascination” by The Human League.

Back to Martha Beck.

For years now, I’ve been really into self-help books, as well as articles written by Martha and the like. Late in 2022, I saw an ad online for a free self-help “Master Class” led by Ms. Beck. I signed up for it and am currently 40 minutes into it (it’s an hour long and I’m not a dummy, I know it’s free so that I can be bombarded with pleas in my email box to sign up for costly self-help courses).

Anyway. I think of myself as a DIY’er when it comes to self help books and courses. From these, I take a little bit of this and a little bit of that, leaning into the nuggets that speak to me.

What caught my attention so far in this course is Martha’s idea of what the word “fascination” means and the importance it holds for finding your path in life. How I see it is that the “path” = my livelihood.

She describes fascination as “attention without effort”. That makes a lot of sense, don’t you think?

We all have those things that we can just focus on and marinate in without even trying, right? Topics, activities, concepts, fields of study.

I’ve got myself a draft folder in which I’ve started a list of the things that fascinate me. It’s going to be a long list that will evolve over time. I think it’ll be worth the effort. Especially if I do something with it afterwards.

What would be on your list of “fascinations”?

Blogging about things that fascinate me is a no-brainer. It’s an opportunity to fly my “freak flag” so to speak; to explore and experiment.

Other potential actions I could take based on pursuing that which fascinates me also fascinates me. Maybe if I follow those threads of fascination, I will unlock a skill or talent I didn’t know I had which will lead to new career opportunities. Or maybe it’ll simply provide me with some solid writing fodder.

As long I’m learning something new, it’s all good.

If you didn’t want to check out the video I shared here, let me tell you what resonated for me, as I gave my shoulders a workout while chair dancing to this song just now.

That would be these lyrics: “just looking for a new direction, in an old familar way, the forming of a new connection, to study or to play”. It’s a good way of describing what I’m trying to do here on this blog in 2023.

And you? Any song lyrics that speak to you, particularly in your blogging life?

Please share in the comments!

Christmas, Cooking, Death, Google Playlists, Joy, Love, Music, Self-Reflection

Music, In-Laws, and a Christmas Regret

4 Comments

The first bluetooth speaker I had was a Christmas present from Hubs’ brother and his wife. I loved it so much.

It was light and had a handle to allow me to easily carry it with me and take to work, to sit outside, or to a party, where I could listen to and share with others the playlists I made via Google. Either I didn’t realize that my brother in law and his wife knew how obsessed I was with music or it was just a lucky guess on their part.

I was so grateful for this present and enjoyed it so much; but for no good reason, I don’t believe I specifically reached out to either of them to say thank you. At the time, I believed Hubs thanked them for all of the presents that Christmas.

My brother in law died suddenly from a heart attack before turning 60, four years ago. It bothers me that I never expressed my appreciation of this gift to him.

Fast forward to Christmas 2022. Hubs only living sibling, my fabulous sister in law, is so thoughtful and generous when it comes to the Christmas presents she gets for all of us each year. This year, one of the presents she spoiled me with was a Google nest. She knows just how much I adore listening to music. She has a great appreciation for it herself. What a fabulous present!

I’m listening to Pink (side note: the three of us-me, Hubs, and SIL, have tickets to see Pink in concert in August 2023) as I write this, which is streaming on the nest. Hubs set this speaker up in the most perfect space; on top of my buffet in the kitchen, next to the Keurig. Having music on in my kitchen is just heaven to me. As I’m cooking something up, I fall into such a pleasurable state of mind while I’m listening to whatever tunes I choose.

One of the best advantages of our move to Minnesconsin is that I get to spend time on the regular with my SIL. I get to tell her again and again how much I love the Google nest she got me this Christmas.

I’ve kind of gotten away from sharing music that inspires me on these blog posts. I’m going to start to rectify that with this incredible song and dance by Pink. The lyrics resonate for me and the athleticism displayed here is fantastic.

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